I am here again in this same situation I was before. I feel so alone. I feel so rejected and ashamed of myself. I thought I have moved on but deep inside I am still stuck to where I used to be. Lord, I know I have many imperfections in my life. I know I shouldn't be writing in my site anymore but this is the only way I can at least cope up and share my feelings.
I have no one else to turn too. I don't want anyone to carry my burdens anymore because in the end all of them leave. I have always been true to every people that I love. I give my full trust to only a few people but still I can't do anything but just to let them go. I can't force anyone to give back the trust and love that I give and I can't force anyone to stay in my life.
I feel so down looking at myself now. I know my life is a mess and I have nothing else to be proud of. I always fall below their expectations. But what they can only see and judge is the person outside of my being. You can see Lord the pureness of my heart. I have always been true and never did I lie to them even to myself.
Lord please help me see that there is still hope. Please heal me Lord. I am still hurting. Some people might have heard my story but they haven't felt the pain I have been through. This pain is unexplainable Lord. Please heal me..I have no one else to turn to right now. All I want is for me and my kids to be happy someday. Please guide me to the path you want me to go.