Saturday, August 13, 2011

..reflections~


 "Of all the judgments we pass in life, none is more important than the judgment we pass on ourselves."

 I was looking at my kids happily playing yesterday and tears just flowed from my eyes. My kids are blessed because they have experienced being “kids”.

I recall a woman who had suffered severe rejection and physical abuse as a child. She was bitten by her mother without cause, shouted at, telling her that she was not of no value, that she would never amount to anything. She was not allowed to play with someone..often times she would play by herself.

She experienced being locked in a small dark room without food for one day. Going to school with lashes on her arms. Day after day, those destructive words went into her deepest thoughts, destroying her self-image and her sense of value. But above all having those scars and bruises permanently marked on her heart.

 I told her, you couldn’t allow your sense of value to be determined by how people treated you. Many people have rejected you..Yes it is too painful but you can’t just be crying for the rest of your life and harboring on your bitterness forever. You have to move on for yourself and for your kids because God has always accepted you of who you are. In His eyes you are of worth.


I looked again..And I saw myself crying..I was speaking to myself for it was my reflection in front of a mirror..For that young girl was me..

There are times in our lives when we may have gone through traumatic experiences, somebody had mistreated us, used, rejected or betrayed us and we have heard a lot of condemning words from other people.

We may not understand everything we are going through right now. But let us learn not to let our past determine of what our future will be. "Let us learn to look up and not to allow the rejection of other people to cause you to reject yourself."

Now that I am a single Mom. I have learned to treat it as a blessing. It helped me to grow and mature as an individual. I have learned not to do the same things that I had experienced when I was young. I learned to love my kids more.With God's guidance.. Loving my "kids"  and feeling their love in return gave back my Value and my Worth of Being a Woman :)

When the waves are taking you under
Hold on just a little bit longer
He knows that this is gonna make you stronger, stronger
The pain ain't gonna last forever
In time it's gonna get better
Believe me
This is gonna make you stronger

18 comments:

  1. My dear Sie, this is very touching. You have endured so much pain and I could feel it but I'm so glad that you're very strong and you keep going despite all that. Your postive thoughts will always be guiding you towards a more worthy and meaningful life.

    May you walk on a more easier path in days to come. Stay positive and keep going! :)

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  2. @Balqis-hello sis..true I have been into so much pain..but I have learned to accept it as a challenge and to believe and hope for the best..there should be no room for condemnation..

    thank you so much Balqis..yes I will keep going on..forward always forward :)

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  3. Beautiful and realy touching my heart may Allah bless u and your family always my mother always said that life ius not a bed of roses specialy for females who is a symbol of sacrifies kindness ,and love :) but in rose if there is a some thorns of bitternes also the fragnance of love which Allah gave us in return as many shapes , and in relation and indeed kids are the fragnance of rose in the bitternes of life*stay blessed:)

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  4. @Aisha-thank you for your nice words Aisha..I agree life is not a bed of roses..we all go through our individual pains and sacrifices..but in our lives God has also blessed us and one of my blessings is having my kids and quiet angel..Stay Blessed too Aisha and thank you for visiting :)

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  5. @Sie: "Let us learn to look up and not to allow the rejection of other people to cause you to reject yourself." Sie this is what I'm feeling from past few days...
    You said what was in my mind, and I failed to describe into words... You freed my thoughts to fly with words... :)
    Stay Blessed

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  6. Yours was a heart-wrenching childhood, Sie. I can't even begin to imagine how mothers can treat their kids that way. I'm nothing short of amazed at how you managed to pull yourself through. You are amazing! Your kids should be proud of you...

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  7. I am sorry to hear about your childhood experience Sie. Reading it makes me appreciate my family more.

    You are a strong person and please keep it that way.

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  8. @Asma Khan-thank you for being here Asma..it's ok all of us go through this but what we are feeling right now will surely pass..we will be happy :)

    stay blessed always Asma..smile :) *hugs*

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  9. @Pepperific Life-hello sis..it was really hard sis and until now I have nightmares..I am still healing till now..yes I have managed to pull myself through because of them..for them sis..

    you are also a single mom sis and I know you can relate that our kids are our most precious ones..and they are one of the reasons why we must be strong :) *hugs sis*

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  10. @Christine-yes having a family with us makes us whole Christine and if you have a happy family with you..you are more than blessed to have them..

    I will continue to be strong Christine..thank you so much for passing by :)

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  11. Its was really painful.. but I am very happy to see that you didn't broke down...
    I know it may sound lame at this point of time but everything happens for good... so have faith :)

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  12. I understand you were talking to the young girl you were. The most important Sie is that today you are a great mum and your kids will one day be able to put lovely memories on childhood.
    It is what happened to me and my sister, we are the smiles that helped our mum to be strong and to forget the hardship of her past, the beating and dark hours.
    Staying strong is not always easy but as you have God in your life, do not hesitate sometime to confess your doubts or fears to him, to ask for his support when being strong is too much.
    Take care Sie and enjoy the games of your children - Innocence is the key to Happiness. xx

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  13. @Madhulika-thank you Madhulika for your words of comfort..thank you for visiting me..I appreciate it so much :)

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  14. @Marie-hello Marie..look I have tears..yes like you my kids are one of the reasons why I am happy and smiling..yes I will stay strong..God is there I know He is listening and can hear my cries..

    *hugs*thank you so much Marie..huh..I feel relieved after reading your comments :)

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  15. Hi sie..I am here again. :). Just want to say..I love the first picture.

    Have a blessed Sunday to you.

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  16. @Christine-I also love it Christine..that pix is a resemblance of me :)..have a blessed Sunday too :)

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  17. Your blog writings are so revealing and healing. Bless you for figuring this out and changing the legacy for your children, Sie!

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  18. @Ms.Jill-thank you ms.Jill..and true-my site have been one of my grounds for healing..a part of them is reading comments and knowing that I have friends like you..love you ms.Jill :)

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